So, I've
been a mother for 5 weeks now.
Where do I start? One thing I have learned is that motherhood
doesn't come with instructions no matter all the books, articles, magazines,
and advice from other mothers you get. In fact, although the advice may help…it
just caused me to run up a wall. This first month was wonderful! But I do want
to point out a few things and mention what I would want different for my next
pregnancies to look back at…and for my hubby to keep in mind as well. As you
read this you may think ‘I already knew that’ but to see it all written down
helped me to be more aware of it.
-You’re going to feel yucky after birth. Your skin is flabby,
you don’t fit into your jeans right away, you don’t have time to curl your hair
and put makeup on, and your leaking onto your extremely ginormous pad. Daddy,
please tell your wife how beautiful she is. Look at her taking care of your
child and admire her. You guys have created life together! Smile at her when
you see her nursing. When your baby cries and the only one that can make it all
better is the comfort of mommy and especially her yummy milk…that’s a beautiful
thing always remind of that. A new
mother needs to be reminded how beautiful she is because of the amazing journey
she just went through.
-Remember your body just pushed out a child and is still working on getting back to normal. (Especially if you haf a cesarean, your body is in shock) So be aware your hormones are very unbalanced. You were just blessed with a beautiful baby. Daddy this is when you come in. Take your days off!!! Let mommy get as much rest as possible, go on walks if she’s capable, remind her of all your blessings, cuddle with her, clean the house, cook for her, and take care of baby as much as you can. Everything will be okay. Strive to be close with Heavenly Father, feel that love and warmth! He can make everything better.
-Mommy is so obsessed with her newborn. She wants to take
pictures of the baby every second and in every outfit. Every store she goes to
she wants to look at all the baby stuff even if she won’t buy anything. Just
let her do it. Don’t complain. Be excited about it too or just act like it. Sorry,
we just can’t help it. Don’t take away that excitement she has.
-Take the help! If people come over and ask if you need help
be honest and tell them what you need. If they offer a meal TAKE IT. You’ll see
what a huge help it is once you got it.
-A new member of the family just arrived and mommy loves
seeing her family grow! Most of all, she loves seeing daddy cuddle, kiss, and
being so gentle with baby. Even if she doesn't show it…every gentle hug or kiss
you give baby just melts her heart. Bonding with baby makes her love you more
so in a sense it’s like your bonding with baby AND mommy.
-Mommy is overwhelmed. After reading all the books,
magazines, and the constant advice from other mommies; she feels like her baby
shouldn't ever cry but then others say you need to let the baby cry it out so
on. Reassure her that everything will be okay. Tell her to go with her gut
feelings on how to raise your baby.
-You read about all this bonding with your baby when you
breastfeed and then you start to see your baby sucking its fingers or pulling
on your shirt looking for the goods and you start to panic because you know the
baby is hungry and you are sore and chapped like CRAZY. Your uterus is also
painfully contracting whenever you nurse. But keep in mind the first couple
weeks is the hardest. Once you get passed it breastfeeding is a beautiful thing.
Nursing in the shower or bath helped with pain and makes the bonding experience
greater. Nursing will start to be a stress reliever. Watch your baby nurse
especially if their awake and alert…make eye contact.
-Give yourself a break when it comes to your energy levels. Don’t
be so hard on yourself. It will come back! Get rest and don’t be ashamed of it.
And daddies, don’t complain if there is no dinner or if your laundry isn’t done.
She used to cook and clean but now there are more priorities to be done. The
last thing you want to do is make her feel guilty of her tiredness. Help her
relax even more by forcing her to sleep, setting up a bath for her, or giving
her a massage.
-Remember to always show daddy love too! Daddy’s can get a
little jealous sometimes especially in the first 6 weeks…if you catch my drift.
A happy marriage means a happy life.
With that being
said, I just want to reassure that this isn't how our first month of parenting
went. I am BY FAR perfect. But now I hope it just gets better from here now
that we've survived the first month we can look back and learn. Also, we have
been using Harvey Karp’s method called, The Five S’s; and it has helped
EXTREMELY with her. So glad we got the DVD I would suggest looking it up it’s
called, “The Happiest Baby on the Block”.
Oh yeah, my longtime
friend Katrina is moving in with us tomorrow!!! I’m so excited to have her here
I know that this change will bring them such great blessings! They already
found a place to rent and her husband signed the lease. So I’m sure she will be
mentioned in my blogs a few times. We will both be wondering around Idaho with
our car seats and strollers looking for some fun (:
Well, I guess it ends here because Aviana is crying for her
nursing time.
